Feelings, I hate them, why don't they just leave me alone? They're like some type of conscience, reminding me of all that I "should" do. Is the mind or should I say the heart that guides you to your fate and destiny?
I just want to be left alone, but I cannot run from myself.IMPOSSIBLE, one of the only things that is not possible is that. They would not leave me alone 'til I have confronted all this "junk" that's stimulating my insides. GOD, why?
I have no energy left, I think I'm going to go crazy. Just lock me up in a mental illness home or something, there's just so much I can take. I DON'T HAVE ANYMORE ENERGY! It's taking over me!! Should I allow it? Is it in my destiny?
It gets lonely, I am lonely yet again all this going on inside of me won't leave me alone. Oh the irony. Nobody understands, I don't think anyone would ever understand what and how you feel, but yourself. Life is lonely, I am a loner in my thoughts,in many aspects, always was, always will.
Life, does it get any easier? It takes the STRONG to deal with this journey.Even though it has been hard, I am remaining a part of that category.
Screw this, I'm not the type to blurt out my feelings detail by detail for the whole world to read. That's not my style, I keep things to myself, maybe that's a problem. Pride and fear have much to do with it, I suppose.I just don't know what to do anymore. Shall I face it? Do I have a choice!?
I have tried, but it seems that I have not tried hard enough. "I am going to FIGHT and do all that it takes to face this" is what, in reality, I want to do, but I do not know if that is what is best to do. A moment of clarity is needed, this "confusion" is drowning my sea of joy.
Is it my fault? Is it destiny? What should be done? I'll continue on this journey of more clarity and thinking. Oh, the pain. Someone once told me, "There's power in prayer", I'll continue praying.
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